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Daily Grief

by Ai fen

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1.
Mantra 02:15
I am the ocean I am the ocean So volatile on the surface But so still So deep I am the ocean Oooh can you feel me? I'm here for you You, you spin me high and Low I know you're far away You're in space But gravity Always, Brings up back together Has the darkness of thy delusion been dispelled by thine inner light? -Arjuna to Krishna in The Bhagavad Gita
2.
I try to get up before the sun Tongue the darkness Feel the silence I wanna see the world rise Come on up and out that line Slow and sly Like it's a spy and we're going to play but who's the eye? Slow and sly Like it's a spy and we're going to play but who's the eye? Chorus: How do you know me? How do you know me? Why should we be friends? How do you know me? How do you know me? We're strangers but, I've slept in your house The light has taken its course and run Another day I'm overcome I haven't seized shit Come on up and out that line Slow to die Don't be surprised you thought you'd play but you're out, of time Slow to die Don't be surprised you thought you'd change but you're out, of time Do you know me? Chorus: How do you know me? How do you know me? Why should we be friends? How do you know me? How do you know me? We're strangers but, I've slept in your house
3.
Peering through your fingers Dare not ask what now Only what's next Make a well informed decision A well educated guess Watcha doin? It ain't dreamin' I seen you sift the night Away (2x) 2020 I was so ready, to say good-bye to you 2020 I was so ready, to see you in the rearview Pandemic, don't panic You got all this time to make yourself New I got an eon long program that'll make you smooth as a baby and tight as a noose Pedal to the metal Heart to the floor When this is all over you wanna be more More than you were before (3x) You saw, the death of the handshake You said, good-bye to the kiss hello Now you're invincible, untouchable Go on get out there You deserve it, you deserve it You deserve to play Go on get out there You deserve it, you deserve it You deserve a holiday Go on get out there You deserve it, you deserve it You deserve to fly away
4.
Green Fire 03:39
Green fire, Burns the ages down To keep me Warm. While the snow trembles Above me, Suddenly, Yesterday was Spring. Chorus: It’s so beautiful And so sad How you turned me into Glass. It’s so beautiful And so sad, How it aches but it won’t last. I feel deep grief A ruptured skin Stones in my lungs Fake out dream You wouldn’t open I wouldn’t close I’ve been talkin' to echoes Not even ghosts Green fire, Burns the ages down To keep me Warm. While I’m indoors Alone, Quarantined Was yesterday free? Chorus: It’s so beautiful And so sad How you turned me into Glass. It’s so beautiful And so sad, How it aches but it won’t last. Nothing has been Silence has sung A heavy tune Only for me You wouldn’t open You wouldn’t open I wouldn’t close I’ve been talkin' to echoes Not even ghosts
5.
The Muse 03:16
Pleading with the night My breath has been baited for ages If the curtain doesn't pull back I'll shred it to ribbons Tie my hair It's been fucking up my vision But I wanted to be pretty Chorus: The Muse she tells me One more baby I don't want to go home I'm lonely She beckons like starlight Burns out before I show I'm warm with anticipation I'll always follow She loves me then she leaves me to suffer through the morning Alone Chorus: The Muse she tells me One more baby I don't want to go home I'm lonely Don't want to go home I Don't want to go home I Don't want to go home I'm Lonely I...
6.
Leave the door unlocked for me I'll be coming in when You've been sleeping long To curl at your feet and leave before you've even known I've been there Chorus: You on I Soldering suffocates at night You on I A change in color that can only mean light You said the stars, they used to make you afraid they used to make you think of dying You said this to me amongst graves So casual like, well you were just small and now it doesn't really bother you anymore at all Chorus: You on I Soldering suffocates at night You on I A change in color that can only mean light A change in color that can only mean light (2x)
7.
I'm having one of those nights Oh you know, you know the kind! Where the sky opens up, black prism a diamond that cuts (2x) Chorus: Slice, Slice me open Let me cede Slice, me down from the crown to the navel And leave You're just a memory I feed You're just a memory I feed That feeds on me, that feeds on me You're concrete, You're stone You get so so so close Then you turn sub-zero I feel flayed The air burns I should go But I see something in you, that says that you need me I see something in you, That says please don't leave me (2x) Chorus: Slice, Slice me open Let me cede Slice, me down from the crown to the navel And leave You're just a memory I feed You're just a memory I feed That feeds on me, that feeds on me But I see something in you, that says that you need me I see something in you, That says please don't leave me (2x)
8.
COVID Techno 04:09
Sneak out to see me But keep your distance Stand two meters apart On either side of the empty street We'd be lying if we said we didn't like it Absence makes the heart grow That's why mine's exploding Chorus: All I can see, are windows And everybody's home All I can give, is a glimpse through I can't let you in If you want to see me Self-isolate Purify, for seven days If you wanna make it nice Call it shelter in place Be safe, If you go outside, Cover your face Chorus: All I can see, are windows And everybody's home All I can give, is a glimpse through I can't let you in (2x)
9.
Can you believe, the year we've had? Can you believe, the year we've had? Can you believe, can you believe? Oh don't you, forget about it It's not over It's just the start Maybe it'll never stop Maybe it always was Can you believe, the year we've had? Can you believe, the year we've had? Can you believe, can you believe? I put my faith in the clouds Maybe it's naive But I feel like they've been talking to me Don't go around with dirty hands and hair With blood or sin or scheme
10.
Her rage, filters through the stage. She cuts my tongue, I succumb Am again If I, saw her on the street I wouldn't recognize Her face She's full of fire Tempered to embers that light when she Calls... Chorus: Cold is the new cool And how do you deal, with getting old? Cold is the new cool And does she feel, what I feel Of course she does A phrase, I've heard her Not say She let's it curl Through her teeth Seep out Slide across the floor Grip me to the bottom So deep I can feel the heat from the Earth's core Chorus: Cold is the new cool And how do you deal, with getting old? Cold is the new cool And does she feel, what I feel Of course she does

about

Daily Grief was written over the course of 2020-2021 and details daily grievances that were encountered, exploited and magnified during the COVID-19 pandemic. The album explores grief beyond the general understanding as a reaction to a life shattering event. Daily Grief posits grief as an emotion that can become as routine as waking and provides a space to grieve the mundane and the seemingly banal.

Daily Grief is Ai fen's sophomore album, released on Vienna based label Tender Matter.

credits

released February 11, 2022

All tracks where otherwise not specified completely composed, produced, performed and recorded by Ai fen.

All lyrics by Ai fen

Featuring:
Vocals by Andrea Rottin on Watcha Doin?
Vocals by Fourtuna & emiznice on Cold is the New Cool
Beats by Relaxcore on Slice

Algorithms was a collaboration between Ai fen and Buitenmens

Mantra, The Muse, and Cold is the New Cool were recorded live at Golden Hive Studio in Prague

Mix by Ai fen
Master by Katie Tavini

Released on Tender Matter 2022

Supported by SKE

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